Ok so yesterday's lesson was how I can appreciate how hard it is to be a mom, and how we as adults can look back at our own mothers and though we may not love everything they did, we can love love them for how hard they tried. A sentiment I sincerely hope Layla Rose adopts.
today's lesson is on a different angle. So I have been on a crusade to loose weight for quite some time and I have lost 71lbs, then gained 48 during pregnancy and now lost 48 to bring me back to where I was. still got 42 to my goal...sigh. I am doing this because I want to be the best mother I can be, I want to have the energy to play with Layla and coach her teams, feel confident in pictures with her and to set an healthy example for her. Tonight I did a crazy boot camp and quite frankly I have no idea how I am going to even make it up the stairs to bed HAHA!! I feel good because I finished it, but it is also a reality check of how far I still have to go. Oh Layla Rose, my little dragon, I hope you know how much your momma loves you so please forgive me my faults, as I am doing some crazy squats for you :) I. AM. SO. SORE!!!
Monday, November 19, 2012
Sunday, November 18, 2012
Family first...especially Moms
So our little Layla Rose is six months old and it has been an amazing 6 months. Not just for the unbelievable fact that I never ever thought I would utter the phrase “my child, my daughter etc” But for the life lessons I have learned each day since she entered our blessed world. Not only have I learned an enormous amount about myself and my resilience, but I have seen my incredible husband through a whole new set of eyes and what’s more is I even saw my own parents through a new set of lenses.
Most of you know that Eric and I had been on a long journey trying to have our little dragon, 5 ½ years of putting one foot in front of the other and it paid off with beautiful Baby girl. Through that journey we have had friends and family support us, and they have been there for us through the six wild months so far. We don’t get to pick our families, ( as they say) and with family comes DRAMA…LOL. What family doesn’t have their ups and downs, but at the end of the day they are always the ones left standing next to you. I know that as a Mother, there is nothing I wouldn’t do for Layla Rose, I never truly understood the sentiment “I would throw myself in front of a bus for my child” well, I do now. Mothers stand by their children no matter what, and as a new mom I can appreciate how much it must have been difficult for my own mom to stand by as I “grew” rebelled and voiced my opinion on just about everything. I try my hardest with Layla, but I know I make mistakes and each time I make I say to myself “gosh I hope she doesn’t remember or blame me for that” And I know that when she is a teen or an adult telling me off or calling me names it will hurt so much, because I will remember all the times I held her and rocked her and tried to make everything ok and I will be telling myself “ but I tried my hardest” I can only hope that as an adult she will understand that I did my best and to not hold it against me. I was really upset with my mom for a while after the baby was born, and at first I just stayed mad and it was ruining my experience with my own child. Then as I was holding Layla one night, I realised the mistake was with me, not her. I was upset and I was even madder that she wasn’t changing what I didn’t like. But how could she if I couldn’t calmly explain how she hurt my feelings and what I wanted her to do instead. It took a few weeks for me to formulate how I would approach the topic. I have a temper (NOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooo..haha) and I knew that if it was going to work I would have to be calm and explain my feelings, while explaining to her that the end goal was that we get to a better place. I really feel that the conversation was so important and has made thing exponentially better. Now not only do I benefit from the wisdom of my Mom, my daughter can enjoy her Nana without me feeling upset. I think that next to parents, the most important people in a child’s life are grandparents. Anyone who deprives their own children of their grandparents are not only selfish by punishing their children from the wonderful experience, but by punishing the grandparents who only want to love their grandkids. Anyways all of this to say that a big life lesson for all parents, is to understand that no one is perfect, families are not perfect, but no one will fight harder for their child or never give up on them like a Mother will and none of us have the right to forget that fact because w eare now mothers and fathers, and god help us if our children should do that to us. Food for thought people…I hope I do a good job, but if I don’t I hope my daughter will understand my mistakes were not on purpose and everything I did was out of love even if it was wrong.
Most of you know that Eric and I had been on a long journey trying to have our little dragon, 5 ½ years of putting one foot in front of the other and it paid off with beautiful Baby girl. Through that journey we have had friends and family support us, and they have been there for us through the six wild months so far. We don’t get to pick our families, ( as they say) and with family comes DRAMA…LOL. What family doesn’t have their ups and downs, but at the end of the day they are always the ones left standing next to you. I know that as a Mother, there is nothing I wouldn’t do for Layla Rose, I never truly understood the sentiment “I would throw myself in front of a bus for my child” well, I do now. Mothers stand by their children no matter what, and as a new mom I can appreciate how much it must have been difficult for my own mom to stand by as I “grew” rebelled and voiced my opinion on just about everything. I try my hardest with Layla, but I know I make mistakes and each time I make I say to myself “gosh I hope she doesn’t remember or blame me for that” And I know that when she is a teen or an adult telling me off or calling me names it will hurt so much, because I will remember all the times I held her and rocked her and tried to make everything ok and I will be telling myself “ but I tried my hardest” I can only hope that as an adult she will understand that I did my best and to not hold it against me. I was really upset with my mom for a while after the baby was born, and at first I just stayed mad and it was ruining my experience with my own child. Then as I was holding Layla one night, I realised the mistake was with me, not her. I was upset and I was even madder that she wasn’t changing what I didn’t like. But how could she if I couldn’t calmly explain how she hurt my feelings and what I wanted her to do instead. It took a few weeks for me to formulate how I would approach the topic. I have a temper (NOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooo..haha) and I knew that if it was going to work I would have to be calm and explain my feelings, while explaining to her that the end goal was that we get to a better place. I really feel that the conversation was so important and has made thing exponentially better. Now not only do I benefit from the wisdom of my Mom, my daughter can enjoy her Nana without me feeling upset. I think that next to parents, the most important people in a child’s life are grandparents. Anyone who deprives their own children of their grandparents are not only selfish by punishing their children from the wonderful experience, but by punishing the grandparents who only want to love their grandkids. Anyways all of this to say that a big life lesson for all parents, is to understand that no one is perfect, families are not perfect, but no one will fight harder for their child or never give up on them like a Mother will and none of us have the right to forget that fact because w eare now mothers and fathers, and god help us if our children should do that to us. Food for thought people…I hope I do a good job, but if I don’t I hope my daughter will understand my mistakes were not on purpose and everything I did was out of love even if it was wrong.
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| #300 Nonno and His little Layla Rose riding a pony at work! gidyup! |
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| #301 Momma and beautiful Layla Rose showing Daddy hpw much Momma wants a pony! |
Wednesday, November 14, 2012
Saturday, November 10, 2012
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| #288 Look ! It has my name! Thank you Uncle Lenny & Auntie Dina! |
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| #289 well...at least one of them is happy... |
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| #290 Oh my gosh!!! You caught me!! I am feeding myself thank you very much....privacy please |
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| #291, OK, so I am having a few technical problem..so what?!?! |
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| #292 Happy Birthday Zadie!! I got you some fingers as a gift..look! they are attched to my hand! |
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| #293 Look at this RIDICULOUS outfit I am in, it is HUGE Seriously Mom? Seriously? |
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| #294 What, can't you see I am busy here?? |
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